You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Randomize
