Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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