he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
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