I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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