is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Randomize
