Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
