Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
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