My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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