yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Randomize