at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Randomize
