when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
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