it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
