His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
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