Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
