So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
honey bunches of taint.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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