Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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