Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Bang-toberfest begins!!
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
