They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
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