Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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