ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
