Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
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