I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
areolas are like halos for boobs.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
