and you said cock pushups were impossible
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Randomize
