how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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