the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
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