I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Randomize
