stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
He told me they were just razor bumps!
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Randomize