No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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