Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
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