I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
