I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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