drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
