Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
