You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize
