i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize