He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
