Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
