The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
