we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Randomize
