My room smells like vodka and shame
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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