I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
