apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Fuck appropriateness.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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