Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Randomize
