why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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