I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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