Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Randomize