I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
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