Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
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