idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
then he tried to convert me to islam
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
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