I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
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