But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
Randomize
